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11th September 2013: The world's gone mad and I'm the only one who knows
13th August 2013: Black is white. Fact. End of.
11th August 2013: Electric cars, not as green as they're painted?
18th June 2013: Wrinklies unite, you have nothing to lose but your walking frames!
17th May 2013: Some actual FACTS about climate change (for a change) from actual scientists ...
10th May 2013: An article about that poison gas, carbon dioxide, and other scientific facts (not) ...
10th May 2013: We need to see past the sex and look at the crimes: is justice being served?
8th May 2013: So, who would you trust to treat your haemorrhoids, Theresa May?
8th May 2013: Why should citizens in the 21st Century fear the law so much?
30th April 2013: What the GOS says today, the rest of the world realises tomorrow ...
30th April 2013: You couldn't make it up, could you? Luckily you don't need to ...
29th April 2013: a vote for NONE OF THE ABOVE, because THE ABOVE are crap ...
28th April 2013: what goes around, comes around?
19th April 2013: everyone's a victim these days ...
10th April 2013: Thatcher is dead; long live Thatcher!
8th April 2013: Poor people are such a nuisance. Just give them loads of money and they'll go away ...
26th March 2013: Censorship is alive and well and coming for you ...
25th March 2013: Just do your job properly, is that too much to ask?
25th March 2013: So, what do you think caused your heterosexuality?
20th March 2013: Feminists - puritans, hypocrites or just plain stupid?
18th March 2013: How Nazi Germany paved the way for modern governance?
13th March 2013: Time we all grew up and lived in the real world ...
12th March 2013: Hindenburg crash mystery solved? - don't you believe it!
6th March 2013: Is this the real GOS?
5th March 2013: All that's wrong with taxes
25th February 2013: The self-seeking MP who is trying to bring Britain down ...
24th February 2013: Why can't newspapers just tell the truth?
22nd February 2013: Trial by jury - a radical proposal
13th February 2013: A little verse for two very old people ...
6th February 2013: It's not us after all, it's worms
6th February 2013: Now here's a powerful argument FOR gay marriage ...
4th February 2013: There's no such thing as equality because we're not all the same ...
28th January 2013: Global Warming isn't over - IT'S HIDING!
25th January 2013: Global Warmers: mad, bad and dangerous to know ...
25th January 2013: Bullying ego-trippers, not animal lovers ...
19th January 2013: We STILL haven't got our heads straight about gays ...
16th January 2013: Bullying ego-trippers, not animal lovers ...
11th January 2013: What it's like being English ...
7th January 2013: Bleat, bleat, if it saves the life of just one child ...
7th January 2013: How best to put it? 'Up yours, Argentina'?
7th January 2013: Chucking even more of other people's money around ...
6th January 2013: Chucking other people's money around ...
30th December 2012: The BBC is just crap, basically ...
30th December 2012: We mourn the passing of a genuine Grumpy Old Sod ...
30th December 2012: How an official body sets out to ruin Christmas ...
16th December 2012: Why should we pardon Alan Turing when he did nothing wrong?
15th December 2012: When will social workers face up to their REAL responsibility?
15th December 2012: Unfair trading by a firm in Bognor Regis ...
14th December 2012: Now the company that sells your data is pretending to act as watchdog ...
7th December 2012: There's a war between cars and bikes, apparently, and  most of us never noticed!
26th November 2012: The bottom line - social workers are just plain stupid ...
20th November 2012: So, David Eyke was right all along, then?
15th November 2012: MPs don't mind dishing it out, but when it's them in the firing line ...
14th November 2012: The BBC has a policy, it seems, about which truths it wants to tell ...
12th November 2012: Big Brother, coming to a school near you ...
9th November 2012: Yet another celebrity who thinks, like Jimmy Saville, that he can behave just as he likes because he's famous ...
5th November 2012: Whose roads are they, anyway? After all, we paid for them ...
7th May 2012: How politicians could end droughts at a stroke if they chose ...
6th May 2012: The BBC, still determined to keep us in a fog of ignorance ...
2nd May 2012: A sense of proportion lacking?
24th April 2012: Told you so, told you so, told you so ...
15th April 2012: Aah, sweet ickle polar bears in danger, aah ...
15th April 2012: An open letter to Anglian Water ...
30th March 2012: Now they want to cure us if we don't believe their lies ...
28th February 2012: Just how useful is a degree? Not very.
27th February 2012: ... so many ways to die ...
15th February 2012: DO go to Jamaica because you definitely WON'T get murdered with a machete. Ms Fox says so ...
31st January 2012: We don't make anything any more
27th January 2012: There's always a word for it, they say, and if there isn't we'll invent one
26th January 2012: Literary criticism on GOS? How posh!
12th December 2011: Plain speaking by a scientist about the global warming fraud
9th December 2011: Who trusts scientists? Apart from the BBC, of course?
7th December 2011: All in all, not a good week for British justice ...
9th November 2011: Well what d'you know, the law really IS a bit of an ass ...

 

 
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AGAINST THE LAW TO BE GRUMPY?
 
I'm sure most of us sympathise with the 22,000 policemen who marched in London today in support of their pay-claim. Anyone who feels they've been shafted by the government is probably right, so far as I'm concerned.
 
But let's face it, some police officers are their own worst enemies. Take for instance the officers who arrested 73-year-old Bill Marshall of Worksop.
 
Bill was expecting them to investigate his complaints about being repeatedly taunted by a gang of youths. Instead he was taken to a cell and accused of attacking the teenagers. Mr.Marshall, who has a heart condition and diabetes, was left distressed and angered by the arrest (I'm sure he was. But why do the newspapers always feel compelled to dwell on people's infirmities? Do they make the injustice any worse? - GOS).
 
The retired miner said that he thought the police had been responding to his complaints about anti-social behaviour by some local youths. "I was quite happy to invite the officer in but then he said I was being arrested and taken to the station accused of assault," Mr Marshall said. "I thought it was a joke at first but then I realised he was perfectly serious. The officer ordered me to take the laces out my shoes as I was being arrested for common assault. I didn't know what to think. One of the yobs said I had hit him and so they took his word against mine. I might have lost my temper and shouted at them, but I did not hit anybody."
 
"I felt degraded spending time in that cell. I can't believe I ended up in jail at my age. I've never seen the inside of a cell before and I don't want to see it again. The police seemed to automatically assume I was guilty instead of talking to me first."
 
Bill had complained to police that he and his wife, Margaret, 72, had been targeted by the gang in recent months. He said "It started for us with kids ringing the doorbell. When my wife opened the door one of the boys was making really lewd gestures."
 
His brush with the law began a week before Christmas, when he spotted the group of teenage boys throwing bricks at the ducks as he walked along the banks of the Chesterfield Canal. He shouted at them to stop. He said he received abuse from the gang and shouted back in anger but did not touch or hit any of them.
 
It took the Nottinghamshire Police a full two weeks to come round to his home. When they did he assumed it was in response to his complaints, so he was shocked to be arrested and taken off to the police cells. After waiting two hours for a duty solicitor to arrive, Mr Marshall was interviewed by officers who later released him pending further inquiries.
 
Now police have dropped any charges and apologised.
 
Of course the police are duty-bound to investigate any complaint that is made to them, so when one of the youths claimed Bill had hit him, they had to act. It's hard to see, though, how their action had to take the form of an arrest.
 
However the police in Kent had no such excuse when they stopped an 82-year-old driver as he drove home from Midnight Mass on Christmas Eve last year, dragged him from his car, manhandled him to the ground and handcuffed him. When ex-Mayor of Gravesend Frank Gibson OBE, tried to defend himself, they charged him with assault. He was found guilty this week and has to pay almost £1,000 in costs, though to be honest I should think having to spend five hours of Christmas Day in police cells is punishment enough, especially for an innocent man.
 
Frank plans to appeal, although his friends doubt whether he is strong enough to see it through. He has arthritis, walks with a stick and until recently was confined to a wheelchair.
 

Frank Gibson OBE

 
When Frank saw flashing blue lights in his mirror as he drove home from midnight mass on Christmas Eve, naturally he pulled over to let the police pass. He was driving safely, listening to carols on Classic FM, and the only alcohol that had passed his lips was a drop of communion wine, so he was taken aback when it became clear it was he the police were chasing. The next thing he knew, two burly officers had dragged him out of his Rover, clapped him in handcuffs and bundled him into the back of their car.
 
Yesterday his misery was complete after magistrates decided it was he who was guilty of assaulting the two officers. PC Steven Cole said Mr.Gibson twisted his thumb so hard during the arrest it made him "yelp", while PC Thomas McGregor said he had been shoved in the chest.
 
He had been stopped on suspicion of drink-driving. But this charge was dropped after a breath test showed he had no alcohol in his blood.
 

PC Steven Cole. Mmm, nice … … but dim. PC Thomas McGregor

 
A spokesman for the CPS (Crumbly Persecution Service) said Mr.Gibson's prosecution was in the public interest as it involved two police officers going about their public duty. Well I've got news for you, Mrs.CPS - the majority of people won't agree with you.
 
The majority of people will think that it's not a policeman's public duty, or in the public interest, to terrorise old men.
 
The majority of people will think that when that old man, no doubt confused and frightened at his ordeal, reacts in an irrational manner, he should be treated with sympathy and consideration.
 
The majority of people will feel nothing but contempt for two young policemen who have difficulty controlling an 82-year-old invalid.
 
The majority of people will be shocked and dismayed that a magistrate's court could stoop to aiding and abetting this vicious official bullying.
 
And the majority of people will remember other things …
 
… the Blackburn Rovers versus Manchester City football game recently when four football badge sellers were approached by Blackburn Police and ordered to stop selling England badges as they were 'racist'.
 
… or Ebbw Vale painter and decorator who has been jailed for more than two years for making Nazi salutes. Or the five boys who only got two years detention for killing a father who collapsed with a heart attack after being pelted with stones and rocks. Or the clergyman arrested because he remarked in his Parish magazine about a Muslim girl wanting to wear a veil at school.
 
… or the father who phoned 999 when his son was knocked unconscious by a drunken thug, only to be told to write to his MP rather than bother the police because they were busy.
 
… or Alastair Oram from Rotherham who complained about yobs terrorising his girlfriend and got a letter back saying he should not call them "hoodie scum". His girlfriend had traffic cones hurled at her car by yobs who blocked off a road in a "no-go" area for locals, so Mr.Oram wrote "Do we take it that Thurcroft is a no-go zone, run by mob rule into which the police are afraid to venture or was it too difficult for you to deal with? What can only be described as a gang of around ten hoodie scum aged about 14 jumped out in front and behind her car with traffic cones and blocked her." Superintendent Keith Lumley of South Yorkshire Police replied "You can't go branding youths 'hoodie scum' - that doesn't give off the right impression."
 
… or public-spirited bus driver Paul Gibbs, who was told that two passengers were smoking crack cocaine and thought he would do the community a favour. As he stopped the number 47 bus at a police station and passengers ran in to alert officers. But, to their astonishment, police said they were too busy to investigate the crime and suggested they call 999 for assistance. Mr Gibbs waited for five minutes outside the station before reluctantly driving off.
 
No, Mrs.CPS, the majority of people are not impressed by your argument, or by your patronising attitude. You seem to think that you only have to make a pronouncement and everyone will roll over with their legs in the air, crying "Oh, yes, of course! Why didn't we think of that?"
 
And PCs Cole and McGregor? I'm afraid we don't think you deserve any pay rise at all. You are not the Messiah. You are a very naughty boy!
 
And please, pretty-please-with-sugar-on, please don't tell us "you were just doing your job" or "you were just following orders". Like Ken Livingstone's concentration-camp guards, we all have to take responsibility for our own actions. If your job forces you to do things you know to be wrong and silly, you should have the balls to quit and find another job. But then balls aren't exactly your strong suit, are they?
 
That's it. Evenin' all. Mind how you go - and be careful, there are a lot of these vicious OAPs lurking in the shadows, ready to pounce …
 

 
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